Saturday, May 23, 2009

Movie marquee mashups


One night in 1981, my dad went to the movies and saw this on the marquee: SWAMP THING MISSING ON GOLDEN POND. The theater was showing Swamp Thing, Missing and On Golden Pond, but, with the titles all squished together like that on the marquee, it was hard not to imagine a movie about a shambling green monster who loses his way while visiting Golden Pond. (Actually, I think I'd pay to see that movie.)

Ever since my dad told me about that, I can't help but look for similar movie marquee mashups. I'm always delighted when I spot one, and they're not as rare as you'd think. (Sometimes I'd swear the people who put up the titles on movie marquees are deliberately arranging them to make the most goofy combos possible.)

Here are some of my favorites over the years:


WATCHMEN RACE TO WITCH MOUNTAIN FAST & FURIOUS

STONED THANK YOU FOR SMOKING

CONVERSATIONS WITH GOD SHUT UP AND SING

EASY VIRTUE IN BRUGES

A WALK TO BEAUTIFUL PARANOID PARK

THE MIDNIGHT MEAT TRAIN HELL RIDE

WHALEDREAMERS WALKING ON DEAD FISH

PROUD AMERICAN TOWELHEAD (Apologies if this one offended anybody... But I really did see it on a marquee!)

MISS POTTER THE DEAD GIRL

JET LI'S FEARLESS JACKASS NUMBER TWO

MARIE ANTOINETTE RUNNING WITH SCISSORS

LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE JAILBAIT

TWO DRIFTERS WAIST DEEP SAY UNCLE

STRANGERS WITH CANDY WHO KILLED THE ELECTRIC CAR

SEE NO EVIL OVER THE HEDGE

HOOT DOWN IN THE VALLEY

PHAT GIRLZ TAKE THE LEAD

WHEN A STRANGER CALLS THE WORLD'S FASTEST INDIAN

FLASHBACKS OF A FOOL FILTH AND WISDOM

FLASH OF GENIUS BLINDNESS

CHOKE SHOOT ON SIGHT SMOTHER

THE HOUSE BUNNY DEATH RACE

A GIRL CUT IN TWO ELEGY

RAMBO MEET THE SPARTANS

JUMPER OVER HER DEAD BODY


I see these things online, too. Just the other day, I saw a listing for upcoming shows of ANGELS & DEMONS DRAG ME TO HELL.

Have you seen any crazy movie marquee title mashups? Share 'em in the comments.


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